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Sunday night I was sitting in my bean bag chair with my husband talking and I realized that my hands were not trying to pull my hair at all.
Ever since about a month ago, I’ve been really aware of where my hands are.
It took me a minute to register this thought because I used to sit there at that time of the night and pull but that night I wasn’t (this was Sunday)?
I looked over at my husband and interrupted whatever it was he was watching and said, “hey, I don’t want to pull my hair!”
He looked at me a little funny because it was a weird thing to blurt out of nowhere but I said it again, I said “hey, I don’t want to pull my hair, like right now, I don’t feel it.”
That really was the best way I could spit out what my head was processing but I was totally overcome with the fact that I didn’t want to pull my hair in this situation.
Nighttime is rough for me, I get tired at night, I sit there watching TV, relaxing and I used to pull my hair – that is, until Sunday.
I have been believing God for awhile that I would overcome this but for the feeling to be GONE, well that is something that I didn’t know how to process at the moment and still two days later, I’m processing it in this blog post.
I went to the internet Sunday night Googling different things trying to find people who lost the urge to pull their hair.
Interesting enough, I found this article about a girl whose therapist gave her 5 words to say and those 5 words helped her overcome.
I posted it to show some others on Facebook who follow my page.
That night Mai Mai from our Facebook group commented on the article and I told her how I found it.
Mai Mai has overcome Trich now for 12 years and she said she had similar experiences to the girl in the article.
So Yesterday, I Still Had No Urge To Pull
I was laying around in the morning, reading my books and I realized, hey, I’m sucking my thumb but I’m not pulling my hair as I do this?
I can’t even tell you how that made me feel, I was in shock and yet thanking God at the same time.
My whole day yesterday was awesome, it was like I was on cloud 9 over it.
I kept saying to my husband, “I don’t feel my hair.”
I went to school last night and told my friend that knows about it that I didn’t have the urge since yesterday.
We both rejoiced because she knows it something I’ve been believing I would overcome.
What Happened Sunday that Made the Urge To Pull My Hair Stop?
Well, I don’t know really?
Maybe nothing, but definitely something.
I’m sort of retracing my steps that day.
I went to church that morning.
In church I actually went up in front of the pulpit during worship and began praying in tongues and just worshiping God.
I didn’t really feel any different when I sat back in my seat.
At the end of service, after a good message about being thankful, I received communion.
We take communion every Sunday this time I had a different attitude when we took it because we had just heard this awesome sermon on being thankful.
It’s been a rough year, but I have so much to be thankful for in the midst of all of it and I just had a full heart of gratitude taking that communion, remembering what Jesus had done.
I had a donut 🍩 when service was over and went home.
Did I Finally Manifest The Healing I Have Been Believing For?
Did my brain finally just retrain itself in this area? 🤔
Its been two and half days and my head still feels different.
My Hands Are On Hyper Drive the Last Couple Days
Since wearing Keen bracelets the past few months, I’m aware of what my hands are doing and although they are not in my hair, they are definitely still active.
My thumb sucking and skin picking seem to be where my hands want to go at the moment but I’m continuing to divert them the best I can.
I went and helped clean at the church today for a couple hours just to put my hands to work.
I messaged Mai Mai in our private group this morning and told her, “It’s Tuesday and I still don’t want to pull!!”
I let her know my hands were still a bit on overdrive but she told me some great advice, she said, start typing!
So here I am, typing it all out – keeping my hands busy as I praise God for almost three days of no hair pulling!!
I’ve never made it more than 4 days and it took so much effort to divert my attention, but this time it feels different, my head feels different the last few days.
It’s really hard to explain in words but I’m excited!!
Something happened.
Related: How To Stop Trichotillomania On Your Own, Even If You’ve Tried Before.
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